Would you rather date a lot of different people, or be in a committed relationship?

Would you rather date a lot of different people, or be in a committed relationship?

Answer here

Cold Panic.

There is a blackness here.

Haunting the ceiling.

Breathing in the shadows and exhaling black.

There is a panic here - filling all the windows.

Masking the air with cold sweat.

A black blackness. Ebb and flow.

Glittered heartache and bleached bones.

Take it upon yourself to tear me apart.

rip my nails from these broken hands.

fixmefixmefixme.

Slit my throat and bleed me out.

I’m falling and it feels just like dying used to.

She rode a pure white horse.

She bleached her hair

and coloured her eyes black

she cut her legs and bled to death.


She dreamed of light but drowned in sorrow.

Took a knife to herself and force fed her mind.

Full to bursting - unable to contain
disasterdisasterdisaster|relief.

she cried into her broken wrists
sobbed through broken ribs
broken stone upon broken stone pavings paved.

She cut her legs and bled to death.

Remained, yours.

I know that you're reading this. I know that these words have reached you and touched that piece inside of you that remains mine always.

I know this because I know everything there is to know about you.
I have lived your life - stood by you step by step and breathed every breath that has passed though your lungs - your tongue, your lips. I have pushed every white strand of hair from your face to clear your eyes. I have kissed every tear, tumbling down your face and caught them in the very hands that kept you and held you and never let you down. I have remained, always and forever, yours.

I want you to know that I love you - wherever you are. Through clouds and soil and the bend as the wind passes through the trees with the sweetest touch - I love you.

You are the hour hand on the clock that never stops - constant and flowing. You are the sun that rises on me - the moon that watches me when I sleep. You are the purest light and darkest night. You are the reason for being. The blood in my veins.

You are my everything and my anything.
You are the reason I live and the reason I die.
The reason I am a better person and the reason that you are so far away.

Know this, with everything you have - when it is too dark around the edges, time is smashing down your walls and every crack in every sidewalk of every street you walk down weighs heavy on you. When no one can hear you scream and your chest feels like it will explode with the pain and sorrow. Stop. Close your eyes and feel me breathe in to your lungs. Feel the lightness enter your body and know that wherever you are - I will always bring you back to life. My one true love.

Breaking White.

I'm ocean deep - lick the salt from my skin
Taste the pain on reflection
Blinding light. Breaking White.

A mere distance coupled by the years
An isolated rumble and clouds coalesce
Take me apart.


Seize a breath and go under
Walkways and fluorescent lights
Burning your eyes
Mugging your skin.

You've awoken me.

Breathe in the salty sea.
Breathe in and taste me.

Heat. Salt.

I’m violent.
In tears and words and heartfelt hate.

I’ll crack your bones.
Grind them with my teeth and tainted breath.

Cracking the foundation.
Water and sand.
Molten Lava.

I’m going to bury you. Bury you alive.

If I’m not too busy catching my breath.

Freckles.

You can build the stone.

Rusty cogs.

Pack it with Earth and Dirt and Reddened Mud.

Make it strong, stronger still.

Make it mine. Make it fast.

Fast and faster still.

I’m losing consciousness. Unconscious with this.

Blind to the dark. Flowing inside. Pouring and heavy.

Push it in and strain yourself.

Struggle for breath.

You’re falling apart with this.

Bending to broken.

Out of time and suicide.

And Suicide.

And Suicide.

And Suicide.

And Suicide.

And Suicide.

And Suicide.

And Suicide.

And Suicide.

And Suicide.

And Suicide.

Fuck your Maudlin Heart.

Weather The Storm.

It’s in the unspoken things.

A touch – closed eyes and parted lips.

It’s in your eyes when you say my name. When you touch my flesh.

The heat of you inside of me.

It’s in my throat, beating with the pain of this.

It’s in your face, streamed tears.

It’s in the catch of my voice.

Strongest is not strong enough for this.

Hold on to your anger, ride it through the storm, it’s all that will keep you afloat.

in this heart

Give me a razor and I will show you my pain.

Exhaust Fumes.

I found a letter,

From your lover in the glove box

And I carved the words - onto your arm

As my heart beat languid with the exhaust fumes

And my eyes turned black.

I turned inside, fell against the door.

Fell down and cried.

My heart beating with exhausted fumes.

Cresent Moon.

I am haunted by myself

my own stupidity

this always wanting - this hunger - this thirst.

Fill this emptiness inside of me.

Desperate need for approval, for love, for affection.

A mother's touch is never enough.

I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I ,I  ,,,,,,,,,,,,

am fucking lost and bound and sick with regret.

lost, drow

DEV.A -STATION.

Here comes the Black Cloud.

Hot water runs and blinds.

The red of you.

The Rage of you.
The Hate of you.
The Bitter you you you.

Here comes the Red Rage.
Here comes the Black Stage.

Don't let it go just yet, giving up is not the same as letting go.

Breathless Abandon.

You're a lush

and so broken
and vulnerable
and screaming out for validation.

You're a wreck
and everything I prey on

You are desire
and all the screaming, breatheless abandon that comes with it.

You're exposed
and I've closed my sights on you

You're a lush
and benetah it all...

I'm lost in you.

You're a lush
and I just wish you were mine.

Untitled

You don't know what it is to pick yourself up from this - to gather strength, move on.
You don't know what it is to cure the cancer that eats at your heart - because the way you're treating it - is the same fucking way it got there to begin with.
You don't know what it takes - to lay it on the line, to risk, to run.

You don't know.

+ I'm the stupid wounded girl, with the stupid wounded heart, that lay it all down, that chose not to fight, for once. That chose - instead of being chosen.


+ I guess, in the end - baby, if I'm stupid, then you're just bad for business.

In the grand scheme of things.

There's that old feeling. The clouds roll in, threatening rain.

Death of.

Destruction of.


There's that old voice again, dripping with Premium Stolen Vodka - it's just this once.
You're that little girl again - wanting someone to notice, someone to love, someone to

staystaystaypleasestayandneverleavemestaystaystay

So, once the other shoe has dropped and you've gotten what you wanted what then?

GLASSGLASSGLASS

a million and one verses over a million and one miles met a million and one tears, over two long years; you're still right here.

Now you tell you want to change, crying into the phone, you tell me I'm your everything, tell me it's not the same.

I want to tell you that my heart bleeds for you, that it's ok, you're forgiven.
I want to tell you that I love only you, you're the one. OTL.
I want to tell you that I'm not jealous of his Melbourne life, the life that was destined for me.
I want to tell you everything, break the silence.
I want to rush, jump, fall back into you.

mindless absolution

GLASGLASSGLASSGLASS

I want to break and cry + shatter around you, to be put back together with you.

TURPENTINE TEARS

finally I've realised

I am happy within him
and not without him

resistance is futile
I can't do this alone

and that everything that holds me back is holding me because I, and I alone let it......

it's time to take this beast by the horns and ride it until the end.

UNTITLED

I smell you, permeating from my skin.
My very cells, clinging to the memory of you,
Ravenous, cancerous.
Eating me inside,
Wretched + bitter,
I boil, under the sun,
My skin darkens,
Clouds gather + the effect is thunderous.
Enlightening.

I'm drowning,
Boiling,
Permeating - you.

cutyoucutyoucutyoufrommyheart

Sometimes you're so coy and sly and I fucking hate you for that.
Sometimes I love you so much that it hurts.
Sometimes I want to fucking cut you - so deep that you bleed out all over my feet.
Sometimes you make me ashamed and guilty and young.
Sometimes I want to crush your fucking bones under my heels and tear your flesh with my teeth.
Sometimes I feel nothing toward you.
Sometimes I mock you + your pathetic ways.
Sometimes I wish that we had never met, despite our pre-disposed paths crossing time and again.
Sometimes, sometimes, sometimes.


Sometimes I feel too hard, sometimes I feel too little.

Most of the time I want to stop feeling at all.

Are you waving or drowning?

I don't know what to do about you.


It's sink or swim........................